I dropped the cover of the security blanket and quit my job mid-year to stay at home and take care of myself and nurture my spirit and soul. As I told my husband, when I walked back to my car and promptly got on my cell phone, “I feel happily irresponsible.”
I've actually been on a leave of absence for the entire second quarter. Whether it was the stress of the parents, the ever changing standards, the administrative expectations, the overwhelming paperwork, or all of the above, it had chewed away at me like a mouse on a block of cheese and I was frayed. I was suffering from virtually daily migraines and my lifetime battle with depression and OCD was becoming much more difficult to manage despite my medication, so it was decided by a group of people whom had my best interests at heart that I needed a break, and boy were they/we right.
The past six weeks off has been a gigantic blessing. I've gone from having six migraines per week to having two migraines in 6 weeks. That in itself is a life changing event. Yet on top of that, my family tells me that they've never seen me smile so much. I've been investing in myself and exploring my passions and hobbies, and I finally feel awake and alive again. It's so rejuvenating.
So after two months of no paychecks and living off my husband's salary while dealing with two catastrophes – our sewer pipe collapsing and needing to be replaced and our bulldog having to have emergency airway surgery – we decided we could take the leap, make the plunge, and travel the road, and so today I made the decision final. It's a little scary, or should I say exhilarating, but I know it also isn't carved in stone. Things change, life goes on, and if need be, I can be a “bread winner” again, but until that time is needed, I'm taking some time to invest in me, better myself, develop my passions, do what I love, and keep impressing my family with how much I like to smile now.
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